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5 Weird Chinese Valentine’s Day Gifts

Treat your boyfriend or girlfriend to a gift of their wildest and wackiest dreams with this shopping guide

02·14·2013

5 Weird Chinese Valentine’s Day Gifts

Treat your boyfriend or girlfriend to a gift of their wildest and wackiest dreams with this shopping guide

02·14·2013

Yeah, yeah, it’s Valentine’s Day.

The commercial world is sucking the joy out of your love life today, am I right? So many shallow expectations, so many broken hearts and a sour stomach’s worth of overpriced boxes of chocolate. It all just makes you want to down a bottle of fancy red wine and wait it out until the cupids give up and go home. And if you’re China, where ‘Valentine’s Day’ is more appropriately called the Qixi Festival and celebrated in late summer, you almost could just sneak through the day unnoticed. Pretend the entire thing never happened.

Or…just this once, you could go all out. We’re not talking roses and diamonds here people. No, China is full of lovely, gaudy gift ideas that are perfect for expressing just how lovesick you really are. Here are five that we liked:

1. Bouquet of Stuffed Animals

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A dozen roses is so cliche. Step it up this year and show you really care with a dozen plush toys instead. Or better yet, two dozen. Get them pre-wrapped in pretty pastel paper and leave them on the hood of her car. The best part? They won’t wilt.

2. Giant Teddy

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It’s go big or go home. Head to the basement of 79 Street market in Xidan or one of those temple fairs to snag an over-sized plush toy to call your own. Get your girl to drag one of these around town and she’ll know just how big your heart is. Doesn’t she look happy?

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3. Baby in an Eggbaby-egg

What’s more to say? It’s a baby, dressed as a rabbit, in an egg. Brilliant, if you ask us. Perfect for telling your loved one you’re ready for that next step.

Not so prepared? Then you might want to invest in #4.

4. Onion Condoms

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Two onions in love? So sexy.

5. Snow Globe

snowglobe

Every woman loves to get a snow globe, right? That’s why so many US commercials feature girlfriends and wives happily unwrapping them during Christmas. The one above was gush-worthy, but it would be even better if the rose bouquet were a bunch of stuffed animal heads from gift idea #1.

Photos by televiseus on Flickr (bouquet), Bridget Coila on Flickr (bears), and Itay Halevy on Flickr (subway)